Sunday, February 15, 2015
Hello again after 1.5 years. I am getting really
inconsistent on this. But will pop by time and time to write whenever I get the
time and inspiration.
Many things have happened since I last blogged. Changes in
life wait for no one. Sometimes you don’t push for a change, the change pulls
you along.
Yes, gotten married last independence day. It was a busy
2014. With all that planning, and hiccups. Learnt to appreciate my grandma and
aunts, and especially my parents more. Amidst the chaos, they were my anchor
and advisors. And most importantly, avid supporters. It was nice to see
everyone participate enthusiastically and made it a point to contribute.
2014 has been a rough patch.
With rude realisations on characters of seemingly harmless origins. A steep learning
curve, and lots of lessons on love, or the lack of.
In life, there will be 5 kinds
of family members
1)
Those who wants to keep their distance, and are
neutral (neither harmful nor benevolent). Their value-add score: 0/10.
2)
Those who want to remain close, and make it an
effort to. And in doing so, share experiences and advises, and be open about
criticisms. Value add Score: 8/10
3)
Those who want to leech on whenever possible,
only looking to take and not to give. Value add score: -6. (they are takers and
hence has nothing to lose if you are not willing to give)
4)
Those who pretend to be number 2 but are in fact
number 3. Value add score: -8.
5)
Those who keep quiet to ‘keep’ peace, who
pretend that problems are non-existence and when surfaced, to seek the victim
to compromise with the perpetuator. Those who possess the power and authority,
but will want to be the ‘good’ guy no matter what, even if they know they ought
to stand up for injustice. Value add score: -10.
And I have the (dis)honour to
have come across some extended family who fall 2 to 5.
People who pretend to welcome
you but secretly wish for the non-existence of you for their own selfish
reasons and plans, which is material. Those who so blatantly take their words
back, and carry on with their selfish plans at the expense of you, without even
blinking an eye, or seeking understanding.
Then those who act blur, act all
unknowing, till the problem really crops up. Then try to pull a fast one to get
the less aggressive one to compromise. Then get annoyed and upset at the victim
when the victim decides to cut losses and leave. I write this with no emotion,
and no pity. The ‘(In)justice Bao’ deserves all the repercussions of his lack
of stand and firmness.
There is no such thing as peace
in the world so long as you have a perpetuator. To root the problem in the butt
can only be done by someone in authority. But if that someone chooses to
ignore, the perpetuator gets away and starts to think what they are doing is
fine. That’s when the problem begins. This theory applies to EVERYTHING in
life- crime, upbringing of children, family, training of pets… It’s a universal
law. But despite it being so universal, it is poorly understood.
Or perhaps they understand it,
but fall into the category of 3. Why not benefit when someone is willing to
lose? Now they need to know that not everyone falls into the ‘pushover’
category. Well, maybe they just need to know that hubby and I both don’t. =)
After 6 months of relative
suffering at the in-laws (you nv know how comfortable the sofa is till you need
to sit on some hard chair), I am happy to be home. Despite having to pay rental
to mummy (no entitlement and I love her style of upbringing), I feel at home
again. Now money isn’t everything. I wish I could tell number 3 that. But I
wait, for karma to tell them instead. Bitches love company!
I am glad I found someone who
believes in the same mentality about life. I am glad I have a mother who knows
when to let me into the sea with a rope, and when to start retracting that rope.
Blood relations doesn’t mean
family. Family doesn’t have to be blood related. How many of us are ashamed
that in the eyes of the public, we are ‘family’ with someone of lousy character
just because we are blood related? And how many of us can think of a friend who
will not hesitate to come forward if you are in deep shi*, despite not being
blood related?
Birds of the same feathers flock
together. But sibling birds can be of different feathers, and different species
of birds can have the same feathers. Hatching from the same nest does not mean
you are stuck with each other for life. Because when you are older, you learn
to fly. Come back to your nest once in awhile, but you eventually need to build
your own, hatch your own eggs. Then at a certain cycle of life, let the little
ones go build a nest of their own.
Ever seen a grown-up bird use
their parent’s nest for egg hatching if they had a choice? Some humans ought to
reflect a lot more. Bird-brain is an understatement.
Just The Girl @
5:35 PM
